Grace from the Past - How Do I Forgive Myself?

Grace from the Past - How Do I Forgive Myself?

1 Timothy 1:12-17

I thank Christ Jesus our Lord, who has given me strength, that he considered me trustworthy, appointing me to his service. ¹³ Even though I was once a blasphemer and a persecutor and a violent man, I was shown mercy because I acted in ignorance and unbelief. ¹⁴ The grace of our Lord was poured out on me abundantly, along with the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus.

¹⁵ Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners—of whom I am the worst. ¹⁶ But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his immense patience as an example for those who would believe in him and receive eternal life. ¹⁷ Now to the King eternal, immortal, invisible, the only God, be honor and glory for ever and ever. Amen.

How many of you remember learning how to drive? How many of you are excited to learn how to drive?

My dad had a horrible time teaching me how to drive because I was obsessed with the rearview mirror. I wouldn’t just glance at every couple of seconds like my dad told me to. No, I would stare in the rearview mirror, studying everything that people were doing behind me, this actually caused me to get into a wreck a couple of times because I would be looking so much in the rearview mirror that I would forget to look ahead of me. Like I said, my dad had a horrible time teaching me how to drive. But the thing I had to learn was that whereas it's good to look behind you, it's even more important to look forward.

In 1 Timothy 1:12-17, the Apostle Paul is checking his rearview mirror. He's looking back on his life, and he's telling us what he used to be like. Here's what he says:

“I thank Christ Jesus our Lord, who has given me strength, that he considered me trustworthy, appointing me to his service.”

Do you hear what Paul is saying here? He’s saying Jesus considered him faithful and appointed him to His service. But my question is, Was Paul faithful when Jesus appointed him to His service. I mean, if you know anything about Paul, you have to question that statement, right? In fact, in the next verse, Paul himself says, “Even though I was once a blasphemer and a persecutor and a violent man, I was shown mercy because I acted in ignorance and unbelief.”

So, when Jesus appeared to Paul on the road to Damascus, with the bright lights shining down and saying, “Paul, Paul, why do you persecute me?” and appointed Paul to be the Apostle to the Gentiles, Paul was a blasphemer. He was speaking against Christ and the against all the people who were trying to follow Christ. In fact, he was on his way to Damascus to arrest Christians. He was persecuting Christ’s followers.

Yet, here he's saying that Christ considered him faithful and appointed him to his service. How is that possible. How can Paul say this?

Because when Jesus looked at Paul, he wasn't seeing Paul’s blasphemy and persecution and violence. When Jesus looked at Paul, He saw Paul in his potential. He saw the kind of man Paul could if he was changed, if he was different. And that’s point for us.

When Jesus looks at, he doesn't see us in our sin. He doesn't see us as we are right now. He knows all about us. He knows all the wrong things we do. But when Jesus looks at us, He chooses to see us as we can be in Him. He looks at us and says, “I have great plans for that person. I can do so much with that person.”

Jesus looks at us and He’s dreaming big. He's looking past our sins, past our mistakes, past our current limitations. He saying, “What can I do with that person?” That’s point number one. When Jesus looks at us, He chooses to see us in our potential.

Look again at verse 13. Paul says, “Even though I was once a blasphemer and a persecutor and a violent man, I was shown mercy because I acted ignorance and unbelief.” Like I said, he's looking at his rearview mirror and he’s giving us his list of sins. He’s counting them out. “Let’s see, I’ve got blasphemy, persecuting Christians, violence.” Let me ask you ask this: If you were writing this verse instead of Paul, what would you name as being on your list of sins?

I know we’re all good people here, but I also know that we've all done things we shouldn't have. So take a moment and think, what are the top two or three things that you would name?

Do you have a couple of things in mind? Look at that verse one more time. “Even though I was once a blasphemer and a persecutor and a violent man, I was shown mercy because I acted ignorance and unbelief.”  

Even though. Even though. Even though I did these horrible things, I was shown mercy. Friends, even though you did those things on your list of sins, you were shown mercy. Isn’t that amazing? You can do all that stuff, and God still showed you mercy. Someone say “Amen.”

Paul goes on to say, “The grace of our Lord was poured out on me abundantly, along with the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus. Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners—of whom I am the worst. But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his immense patience as an example for those who would believe in him and receive eternal life.”

Did you hear how Paul started that set out of verses? He said, “The grace of our Lord poured out on me… a little bit? Enough to cover some of my sins? The little ones?” No. “The grace of our Lord was poured out on me… abundantly.”

Abundantly. Do you know how much “abundantly” is? It means it’s enough. It’s more than enough. God’s grace is enough to cover all of our sins. You can’t do something so bad that God’s grace isn’t enough to cover it. God has more than enough grace. So, if you believe in the sacrifice of Jesus, you can believe that God has forgiven you for your list of sins completely.  

The next thing Paul says is, “This is a trustworthy that deserves full acceptance.” Paul is saying, “Listen. If you don’t hear anything else, hear this. This is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance.” He’s saying you can take this to the bank. “Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners.” That was His mission. That’s all He came to do – save sinners – and He did it. He saved sinners. If you’re a sinner and you believe in Christ, you’re saved. Done deal.

Jesus came to die in our place. Jesus, an innocent man, took the guilt and punishment for each of us, for each of our list of sins, on Himself and died. Christ has taken our sins. Do you know what it means when someone takes your sins? It means you don’t have them anymore. He took them. He has them; you don’t. He took them on Himself, and He died. And now because our punishment has been taken, the way is clear for us to be forgiven.

“Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners—of whom I am the worst. But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his immense patience as an example for those who would believe in him and receive eternal life.”

Paul says he is the worst of sinners. Paul knew all the wrong things he had done. He knew the weight of his sins, just like I’m sure you know the weight of your sins. You know how bad they are. But what Paul is saying is that Jesus can forgive him for all the wrong things he’s done, the worst of sinners, then Jesus can forgive anybody. He can forgive me. He can forgive you.

God’s grace is abundant. Even though you did those things, God showed you mercy. Psalm 103:12 tells us that God has separated our sins away from us as far as the east is from the west. As far as the east is from the west. Do you know how far the east is from the west? They’re complete opposites! They’ll never touch.

When Jesus took our sins on Himself, He took those sins to the grave. He buried them. And when He came back from the grave, He didn’t bring those sins back with Him! Those sins stayed dead. They’re not coming back! That means those sins don’t have power over us anymore. They’re dead and gone. RIP sins!

We don’t have to worry about those sins. We don’t have to feel guilty about those things that happened in the past. Because they’re gone. They’re dead. They don’t have power over us in any way. We don’t have to stay stuck in those sins. We don’t have to keep repeating those things because they’re dead and gone. Christ took them to the grave. Those sins are dead; we’re still here.

The problem is that most of us know Christ died for us. Most of us know God forgives us. But for some reason, we’re still haunted by the things we’ve done in the past. We still feel guilty for our past sins. We’re still looking back in the rearview mirror and remember those things and feel like those things still have a hold on us.

I know what that’s like. When I was a young teenager, I did something that was just horrible. I’m not going to tell you what it was, but I can tell you that at the time, and for years afterward, it seemed like what I did was the most sinfully disgusting thing a person could do. And whenever I thought about that, I was overcome with feelings of guilt and shame. When I thought about myself, that was what I thought about. It seemed like that one mistake, that one act, that one sin, was what defined me as a person.

But that was Satan telling me that. That wasn’t God. That was Satan throwing that mistake back in my face and saying, “All you are is that person who committed that sin. That’s all you are, and that’s all you’re ever going to be.”

It took me years to realize that carrying around all that guilt, constantly looking back in that rearview mirror, isn’t what God wanted for me. God sent His Son to take my sin and bury it so that I can be free of it. The way God looks at me – the way Jesus chooses to see me – is not as the person who committed that sin. He chooses to see me as I can be in Him.

And so, I want to encourage you, if you’re dealing with something in your past, or if you’re dealing with something in your life right now, take a hold of God’s promise that He has separated that thing from you as far as the east is from the west, as far as life is from death. It’s gone. It doesn’t have any power over you. You can be free of it.

And I want to encourage you to take a look at yourself through God’s eyes. Do you know how God sees you? God sees you as His child, whom He loves infinitely. That’s another one of those words. “Even though” you did this, this, and this. “God’s grace is abundant.” “Christ’s patience is unlimited.” God loves you infinitely. When you make a mistake, God’s love for you doesn’t change. His attitude toward you never changes. No matter what you do, His love for you stays as strong as it ever was.

He loves you as His child. You are a son – you are a daughter – of the King of the Universe. Do you know what that makes you? That makes you royalty. You’re a son – you’re a daughter – of the King. You’re royalty. You are a prince or a princess in the Kingdom of God. You are the pinnacle of creation. This whole thing you get to rule over one day with Christ. That’s the promise of Scripture. You’re at the top. Nothing should keep you down. Nothing should have power of you. So, hold your head high and be proud of who God made you to be. You’re royalty.

God sees you as being completely innocent. Because Christ took your sin, you don’t have it. When God looks at you, He sees that the slate has been wiped clean. It’s like you never did those things on your list of sins. They never happened. Christ took your sins. You’re clean. You don’t have to feel guilty about those things. You’re new.

God sees you as being someone full of potential. God wants to do great things through you. God wants to do great things in you. The problem is that if we keep looking back in the rearview mirror at the mistakes we made in the past, we can’t focus on what God is doing in us now. It’s good to look back once in a while, but most of the time, we need to be looking forward. God’s looking forward. He’s ready for your future. We need to be looking that way if we’re going to see what He’s doing.  

God sees you as someone to bless. He loves you so much. He wants to shower you with His Fatherly God blessings. He wants to give you gifts. He wants to do good things in your life. But again, we can't see those good things that He's doing now if we keep looking in the past.

That’s how God sees you. That’s all that matters. God, the infinite, all-powerful Creator of the Universe, has forgiven you. It’s time for you to forgive yourself. Stop looking in the rearview mirror. Start looking forward and embrace your true identity in Christ. Amen?